when I would be doing other things,
I write words inside my head.
I write words for you as I inhale,
words for you as I exhale.
I write because of your warm hand, the way it felt on my shoulder
I write so I do not close my eyes, and lean back into that comfort
I write so I can leave without reassurances.
I write the words so they brush lightly across the page, touching sightly; I write til I can lean into their comfort.
till the rasping of my pen on this page calms me
till the blank space is filled with words
and within words, I can relax.
you, as I inhale
you, as I exhale
I write for long enough, I will not want to
lean back and rest against your body,
place my head by your neck, close my eyes and breathe.
I lean into words, into the rasping of pen on paper, into the large letters curving across my page
here, in these words, I rest and close my eyes.